Finding Who I Really Am & Embracing It - Shadow Work - Spiritual Awakening - Melody's Thoughts

        Lately in my life I've been doing a lot of self evaluation. This is not just evaluating my own life purpose. It's also about seeing into my spirituality and who I really am at a soul level. Some people call this Shadow work, because I have been delving deep into my own Darkness. I've been seeing my darkness for the beauty that it really is. I have heard before that in order to truly get to the light you have to go through the darkness first. In my own way I feel as though going deep into your internal emotions; and whatever blockages you may have, that can help you to really understand who you are. Because no matter if it's deemed as positive or negative, if it's within you, it's a part of you. So I need to give more awareness to every part of who I am. That's what I've been attempting to do lately. It's been causing a lot of issues in a way. I have been questioning whether or not I am content and happy with my life. Personally I do feel happy with my life. But what is even more important here is I do not share who I truly am. Earlier today I saw an interview with Jim Carrey. It was on YouTube. I saw this interview and in the interview Jim Carrey was discussing how he is no longer Jim Carrey. He is coming to terms with who he really is. He explained it in a way which I feel is very straightforward. In today's life we are conditioned to play certain characters. When you are going to work and those fake Smiles that you give, that's a character you are playing. When you are going to church, even though you do not believe in that religion, that's a character you are playing. When you are pretending to be somebody who you are not, you're playing a character. You are giving life to somebody else that is not you. So he explained that he has come into Awakening of who he really is. So that led me to question whether or not I am awakened to who I am really. For the most part I feel as though I am. I know where I'm going and I know what I know. But the only difference is I am reluctant to share certain parts with the world. Why is that? Is it because I'm nervous to be completely genuine about who I am? Is it because I am afraid of feeling judged? Those are things that I felt I had already overcame, but I'm slowly beginning to realize that I have not truly overcame those fears of being judged.

        One example of this is my YouTube channel. I had recently got to a point where I was uploading different videos Almost daily. But I was doing this to help others. Sometimes I would do these videos to share my own opinions so that if somebody else came across it, it would maybe help them. But in a way I was not discussing what I really wanted to discuss. Or at least I was not putting my complete self out there. I had recently got into talking about the Norse gods and goddesses. I had recently started talking more about me being a Pagan. That was me slowly beginning to come out of the spiritual closet, and show who I truly am. I am a pagan who has deep roots in Witchcraft and ancient traditions. I love all of that. I honor the Norse gods and goddesses, but I also honor other pantheons as well. I love Greek mythology as well as Norse mythology. But when it comes to Christianity I still honor the presence of God and Jesus, but I also honor a demons and Satan and the Underworld. That is where I am not truly being upfront about who I am and what I am about. You might say that it's nobody's business, and you would be partially right. It is nobody's business. But I want to share who I am and what I am about because I am proud of it. We live in a civilization where we should be proud of who we are no matter if we are worshipping Satan and the demons and connecting with the underworld or if we are being pretty little Christians. No matter if we are being pagans and honoring the north gods and goddesses or delving deep into the practices of the ancient Greeks. It does not matter if we are coming into awareness of Hindu beliefs or Muslim beliefs. Whatever your beliefs are it is important to be proud of them, because your beliefs are a part of you. They are your experiences in this lifetime. That is what I am realizing. I need to be completely forward with who I am in order for me to respect myself. In order for me to talk the talk I need to also walk the walk. So many times have I told other people do not be afraid of your spiritual beliefs. Do not be afraid of who you are. Yet I was being afraid of Who I Am by not being forward with who I completely am.

            It took a lot of strength to begin talking more about my Witchcraft and my Pagan beliefs in my YouTube videos. It took a lot to begin to talk about my connections with the Norse gods and goddesses. When I say it took a lot of strength, I mean I was scared to put those videos up. I was scared. Why? Why in the hell would I be scared of that? It is because that was the part of me that was afraid of being judged, and the part of me that did not fully Embrace who I was and who I am? But through this Shadow work, that me and my husband Dwayne have been doing, we have been coming in to a lot more depth about Who We Are. Who we are as a couple, but also who we are individually. So what you can expect from this blog is me discussing more about who I am and really giving you my own opinions and my own truth in the way that I see it.

          Recently I have been through a breakup with a friend. This was a friendship with a female who I felt was very sisterly to me. It was hard to break that friendship and I'm not going to get in-depth about why it occurred. But part of the reason was because when she first met me I was not embracing who I truly was, but deeper into the friendship I began to realize who I was and really begin to show that and bring that forward. It was something that was a lot to take in, and as such it put a strain on our relationship. That sisterly friendship that we had. That strong bond was diminished. I have recently been looking into other friendships in my life and I see how they led me to where I am right now. I honor what happened in my past because that is where it led me to the present. But that's also what this is about. Not looking too much into the past, but also not looking too much into the future. It's about being in the here and now and really enjoying each moment for what it truly is. So that's what I'm going to be doing. You can expect a lot more of my own personal thoughts on this blog. I call it a Blog but it's my website. It's a website that I've had for a long time and I do hold a lot of pride in it. I am happy about this website. But at the same time I have not been genuine with it, because I have not put myself completely out there.

           So who am I? What am I about? My name is Melody and I live in Delaware of the United States. I have lived here my entire life and my ancestry has lived here for a long time. I love living near the ocean, and I am a Cancer which is a water element. I enjoy the ocean deeply. I feel a Soul Bond and sometimes a romantic connection to the God Thor, but also the god Poseidon as well. This is something that my husband knows completely about. He has his own connections. We love one another deeply, and that's another aspect of who I am. I also Channel a lot of different entities. I love channeling. I love connecting with the higher dimensions and the spirit realm. That's a deep part of who I am. Some of the beings that I have channeled for our deceased humans that have not crossed over, different gods and goddesses, alien entities otherwise known as the Galactic Federation of Light, Angelic figures, demonic figures, mythological beings. As you can probably see I am a very open person spiritually. I try to keep an open mind in my spiritual beliefs. I have also helped Spirits cross over. These are human spirits who have been left here after their deaths for whatever purpose. You might also call me as Spirit keeper even though I do not like that term. I do not keep these Spirits, I just have a friendship with them and I let them have a home here if they are not ready to cross over. I welcome them to be around me if they are not ready to cross over. This is also something that my husband does with me. We call this our Spirit family. Maybe in another article I will go more in-depth into What Spirit keeping is. Another set of entities that I have channeled before is djinn's. As I have mentioned before I am also deep into witchcraft. I do not like to label it black or white anymore. This has been something that I have done before. I labeled myself as a white witch, but I am coming to realize that it's not that simple. Life is not that simple as there are a lot of Grey areas. So I practice Witchcraft and I try to not go against other people's Free Will. I only cast spells for myself when it is completely needed. I do offer my services in my DarkSecretCreations Bonanza shop. But it is not anything to do with curses. The spells that are offered there are beneficial to the individual. But basically that's the beginning of who I am and what I am about.

        I have also recently been connecting with a lot of Lokeans. These are people who honor and worship and feel very connected to the Norse god Loki. I have always felt a deep connection to Loki, as well as Thor and Poseidon like I mentioned before. But Loki has always been like a best friend in my opinion, and connecting with other people who honor and worship Him is great. I'm very happy to see that people are digging deeper into who the gods and the goddesses truly are. I have also talked with a lot of GodSpouses, this is another topic which I have a lot of appreciation for. So I guess that's where I'm going to end this, because I don't want to sound to rambling. But who I am is not easy to answer and it will likely take a lot of posts to really establish who I truly am. So if you have read this entire post then I'm happy to have you here. Please bookmark my website and sign up for the notifications for when I post something new on here. You may have been to my YouTube channel, I may not post as much on my YouTube channel, as I am really digging deeper into who I am and learning how to really put that out forward. So I feel like the best place for me to begin is by embracing my own thoughts through writing, but at the same time I want to share them. So I figure you do using my website that I feel a lot of Pride for is the best option. If you have ever had any issues with coming into awareness of who you really are or if you have been going through a lot of spiritual Awakenings or Shadow work, leave a comment on this post and share with the world or whoever made read this article what you have been through. Give them a sense of hope. I hope that you enjoyed this until next time, Cosmic Blessings.