My Spirit Shake Ups Of 2019

        Where to begin... Holy Hell... The past few days have been filled with a lot of odd moments. Honestly this entire year of 2019 so far has been filled with a lot of odd moments. I hardly know where to begin. I thought I would share my thoughts here just to get them out. Okay so this year beginning with January there was a change in my work. One door closing so others can open type of situations. And that shook me up for a good while. Made me examine some work goals and life goals. I had to go to the dentist to get two teeth pulled because they were being assholes getting infected and shit. I extremely dislike dental visits, and for this one I didn't get put to sleep. I was awake and trying not to pass out from nervousness. But alas... I survived and it wasn't all that bad. Those two bastards are out, and I wanted to keep them... but the doctor said they were biohazzard waste. I was like.... mmkay. But I got some photos. To spare you of the grossness I won't show you the tooth photos. I overcame my fear of the dentists, and I guess I am happy for the tooth pain. It helped me face the fear. I'll show you a photo of my jaw when they were abscessed.

        This year so far though could have been much worse. I'm not trying to talk shit about my life. I'm just releasing some pent up thoughts here. The changes with some of my work goals is a slow process, but it is a process ultimately I am happy to take on. I am inspired to write more and create more. Things are slowly moving, but moving nonetheless. I see now that the changes that happened with my work in January happened to give me a bit more time to focus on new goals. It made me have to transition some stuff, but I don't mind doing that if it's in the good of my future. I have also been working on strengthening myself, my relationships with loved ones, my bond with the spirit realms and my spirit team, and ultimately strengthening the bond with my soul. However, it hasn't been an easy ride. The strengthening is happening through some emotional cleansings. It's like a spiritual death and rebirth. Which I am happy to take on, because I know it'll lead to awesome things. But in the meantime the road has some bumps. Like depression, which I've always had my whole life on and off. These things are surfacing in order to make way for a healing, because how else can I heal if I don't realize there is something there that requires a healing process. So I am taking this on, and I am going with the flow as this process continues.

       More recent events have happened this week actually. The other day I heard a loud noise. It sounded like something hit the roof. I went outside to check and it was a damn golf ball. I don't live that close to a golf coarse, but I do live in a neighborhood with neighbor kids. We all know how kids can be. Honestly though, when that happened I thought it might be an omen of something yet to come. Now wait a moment while I explain this next thing which happened before the golf ball. I live with family, and we order take out sometimes. We have a drawer of sauce packets and fortune cookies. Well normally nobody opens or eats them. But the other day (before the golf ball) I went into the kitchen and saw an opened fortune cookie on the counter. It said the following "Two important decisions shall be made by you soon." At first I was like what the hell? Then I thought well someone probably opened it and decided not to eat it. But then I was like, nah Melody... this is a sign of something. 

      So I show my husband Dwayne and we save the fortune paper. Then a day or two later the golf ball happens. Then last night, let me explain to you about last night. Keep in mind I've been feeling depressed on and off. It comes and goes sometimes in the span of just hours. Last night roughly around 10pm est. there was a leak in the pipes in the bathroom right near the shower. It was loud like a waterfall gushing. The water in the entire home is now shut off awaiting plumbers in the next few days. So that sucks, but it's an old home and shit like that happens with old pipes. I can live without running water for a bit. I have before. But after that happened I was scrolling through my facebook feed. Which I usually don't do. But the past few days I have been urged to. I saw that a guy I knew passed away around the same time as the golf ball and fortune cookie. I didn't know him deeply. I met him because he owned a machanic shop and I went there all the time for my 1999 Chrysler. He would help me out if I needed it fixed and if it was expensive. He was very nice, friendly, generous. I remember sitting there one time with Dwayne for hours. I swear it was like all day waiting for the car to be finished. I was chatting with this guy just about the whole time. He was so nice, and this year his shop closed because the owner of the building wouldn't lease him again. So he was actively looking for a new shop to rent. Well he didn't find anything and decided to retire and enjoy life with his wife. Then he passes away this month. Sad how it happened. But at least he enjoyed himself during that time. I didn't know him much at all. I don't know his family. Just him from the machanic shop. But he impacted me a lot by being so generous with a stranger who was trying to fix her car. It's crazy how we can impact people deeply who we barely even know. I shed some tears last night when I saw the news. So that happened... and it's made me think about how short life can be. How we need to seize the damn moment. Grab life by the balls. Take control of shit and fucking have fun, be real, be ourselves, and just go with the flow sometimes. 

        Oh!! I had someone on instagram randomly tag me in a photo of The Hanged Man. My Gawd how syncronistic is that? I relate. The meaning of that card is spot on. It's about letting go, having an emotional release, surrendering to experience, ending the struggle, being vulnerable and open, giving up control, reversing, changing your mind, overturning old priorities, seeing from a new angle, upending the old order, suspending action, pausing to reflect, taking time to just be, giving up urgency, living in the moment, waiting for the best opportunity, sacrificing, being a martyr, putting self-interest aside, going one step back to go two steps forward, giving up for a higher cause, putting others first, etc. So it's another sign that I take as a positive one ultimately. I've also been seeing repeating numbers much more. 1111, 111, 444, 333, 222, 555. Mainly 1111, and 444 though. So I take those as good signs, and I also had a deja vu moment the other day which I personally take as a sign that I am on the right path. So yeah those are my thoughts. You're still here? Thanks!! It's nice knowing someone is listening. You have anything to share about your year of 2019? Leave me a comment and let me know I'm not alone in shit being shaken up this year. 

Cosmic Blessings